Mighty in the Prayer Closet, Roadkill at the Grocery Store

I am finding that I am a mighty, faith-filled, praising, love-filled Christian. At least when I am in my quiet sitting room, the one with my favorite coffee table books (art and photography), the two paintings my mom did for me, my favorite couch, and a brightly burning scented candle. I am a virtual spiritual powerhouse, I tell you, with my favorite pink and brown NLT Bible open on my lap, the sound of the occasional bird singing outside the tall windows. You should read what I write in that scrolled journal filled with quotes from famous Christians.

Inevitably, life intervenes at some point in the day to follow. I am finding that each time I form a new resolve to stay in the Word and in prayer, i-n-t-e-r-e-s-t-i-n-g things follow. It seems situations that provoke the darkest places in my heart, conversations that poke my deepest insecurities, fears and anger hot-buttons come swinging straight out of nowhere. Or do they? Could God be allowing me to get a good look at how badly I need Him to renew my mind, cleanse my heart and strengthen my faith? I know God does not tempt us. Satan does that. He despises Christian growth, wants us out of the Word because he knows he cannot twist the truth if we are in it every single day. And prayer, whoa now, prayer absolutely disrupts and destroys Satans goals and dreams. He does everything he can to oppose us in these pursuits. I think God allows some of these things to give us a window into the areas we need to surrender. Surrender, especially in my case, is something that has to happen over and over. As we surrender areas of weakness in our lives, God's power comes in. No, we will never be perfect, but we will find ourselves growing stronger in areas where we were previously roadkill every single time Satan buzzed past in his Mazerati. The net effect is that we are becoming more mature in our faith, more SOLD-OUT to Jesus Christ. I have prayed for God to remove my temper again and again. Finally, a lightbulb came on in my mind and I realized that it just doesn't work that way. We cannot get help a-la-carte. We have to continually submit our entire being and whole life to Christ for his purposes and molding. Every single day. Several times a day!

Paid in Full...Beautiful Words for the Believer

I remember sitting in a dark movie theater, young heart pounding at the sight of a ruggedly handsome young man helping a band of American high school boys duck an entire Communist army which had overrun their small town. "Red Dawn," the best movie I ever watched as an adolescent, now seems corny and fantastical to me. However, I do recall that the star of the show, a young Patrick Swayze, was one of my very favorite actors way back then. I don't watch a lot of movies now, and had pretty much lost track of his prolific film career when he announced a few years ago that he had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. "Oh, that's so sad," I said to no one in particular, my hand probably involuntarily rising to my throat. You know how it is when a star who reminds you of your youth passes away. It's like a part of your childhood fades. I felt that way when Andy Gibb died, too. Patrick, as most of you know, passed away after a brief struggle with his illness. It was heart-wrenching to me to see photos of him in his waning days. Gone was the rugged mantle of athleticism he had always worn with pride. He looked like a frail old man, though he was only in his fifties.This morning I happened on a slide show of pictures from his interesting life that included a voice-over narration from Patrick himself. In it he told the story of how he found out he had a terminal disease and the philosophical path it sent him down immediately. It broke my heart to hear him wonder if he had been a good person, if his life had been good enough. "Is there a heaven? Will I make it in," he recalls wondering immediately. I felt a rising panic in me as I read his words...I have reflected much on the quality of my own living these last 43 years. Suddenly, I was brought up short by a simple realization accompanied by a PROFOUND sense of gratitude to God. No, my life has not been enough. The most heartfelt, sustained efforts by myself to live every moment perfectly would never have been enough. However, what Jesus Christ did on the cross was abundantly, completely, perfectly and EVER MORE THAN enough!! Praise God forever!!! Yes, I will make it in. No, this life is not about me and my efforts. I will seek to give Jesus all of me for the rest of my life on this earth, but not because I want to achieve heaven. That has been done for me. I will serve Him because in his perfect will is the only peace I will ever know. I will also serve Him because I love him and He deserves all. He gave ALL that I might have all. Thank you, Jesus!