A Hollow Victory for the Crows

I see metaphors in nature they way police officers spot traffic violators. They just seem to leap up in front of me as I go on my merry way. (I once absentmindedly followed a car through a light that was turning red as the car turned, right in front of a stunned officer.) I hope I don't burn out my blog audience with the endless references, but here goes another. I have fought a short but furious battle with raucous, cawing, marauding black crows and wily, destructive, pillaging squirrels for a couple of weeks now. I have run through copious amounts of birdseed and worn myself out beating on my kitchen windows. I have undoubtedly frightened my close-by neighbors by suddenly wrenching open my back door to shout "GO!" to the horrible little moochers as they devastated my birdseed supply.

Here is what I had in mind when I bought my feeders and stocked myself with seed: an endless procession of tufted titmice, chickadees, eastern bluebirds, cardinals and other elegant, softly twittering birds to grace my feeders, prompting cries of "Oh look!" and "How beautiful!" at the dinner table. That is exactly what I got...for all of about twelve hours. Then the aforementioned Visigoths arrived in two warring factions seeming to vie for the title of "BEST DECIMATORS" on my deck. I am laying down my arms. That is to say, the seed feeders are coming down. All that will remain are the hummingbird feeder and the birdbath. Certainly I will be sacrificing the OCCASIONAL small bird, like the chickadee which seemed newly hatched that delighted me two days ago as I perched on my deck, laptop flipped open. He was timidly in search of a little snack, but I scared him. (By comparison, a crow can inhale a gallon of seed before I can, pots and pans banging, run him away.)

The point here is that isn't it nearly always the case that with everything worthwhile that we pursue in life, along comes something negative that we didn't plan for, didn't welcome, and certainly will not put up with? While I have surrendered to the crows and squirrels, there are things in my life that I will not surrender at all. No matter the cost. Those pursuits God has directed me to I will forge ahead in like a plow mule with blinders. I must remind myself that, while challenges and distractions may surprise me, they have not surprised God and, if He is leading me on, then on I MUST go and will go in the full power and annointing of the Holy Spirit. And, by the way, since I know He cares about the little things...I expect a bustling crowd of hummingbirds this season and a very active bird bathing "center" just off of my deck all summer. Can't wait to see which birds He sends. He ALWAYS has the last word and what He blesses cannot be cursed! 

All of Me

I have mentioned in the past my frequent appeals to God to free me from certain strongholds of sin (read temper). I have begged, pleaded, cried and prayed. Once again this morning I felt an urging in my spirit that God does not do "a la carte" sin removal. He wants all of us. Every cell.

If that seems like a tall order to your weary heart, there is some earth-shatteringly good news for you in scripture. Here goes..."Come to Me (Jesus says), all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. FOR MY YOKE IS EASY AND MY BURDEN IS LIGHT." (Matt. 11:28-30, NKJV). He is patient with us, kindly and gently leading us along, strengthening us and doing all of the heavy lifting. What a Savior! As He makes us more and more like Him, we respond by yielding more and more of ourselves to Christ. The end result is spiritual growth. When we fall, it is Jesus himself who lifts us up and dusts us off.

How many have forgotten that life in Christ is simple? I know I have, many, many times. Spend time with God in prayer, both speaking and listening. Pray about everything, all day long. Ask for direction, guidance, the discernment of the Holy Spirit in every situation. Saturate your mind with the Word of God, the Bible, both by personal reading time, and by finding sound Bible teachers to instruct you, such as a great pastor or Sunday School teacher. Read books by godly Christian authors. Knowing the truth of God's Word is the ultimate defense against Satan's lies and distractions. Refuse to allow television programs, books, magazines or internet content that would quench the Holy Spirit's work in your heart or dim your vision as a saint of God, intent on honoring Him in every single thing you do, enter your personal space. Guard the gates of your heart at all cost. Turn away from temptation by calling on God. Give your all to Him, and His Holy Spirit will fill you to the brim. Last, but certainly not least, make the most of every opportunity to serve others as the Holy Spirit directs you, showing love to all, but make sure your closest companions are those Christians who will strengthen you in your walk with the Lord.

Inevitably, while you are doing all of the above, you will, because you are human, stumble and fall. Sometimes heart-breakingly hard. DO NOT let this derail you! "Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits; Who forgives all your iniquities, /Who heals all your diseases, /Who redeems your life from destruction, /Who crowns you with lovingkindness and TENDER MERCIES, /Who satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's." (Psalm 103:1-5, NKJV)

And...AWAY WE GO!!!

In a microburst of home improvement, my husband moved the dated behemoth that housed our old t.v. and stereo on to Goodwill one afternoon recently. As he was undecking that 90s-era cherry monstrosity, he handed me something that had been lying flat and unseen somewhere on top. Never breaking stride (when he gets ready to do something, he always leaves me somewhere bobbing in his wake, and I'm the one who has German ancestry and should therefore have a decent work ethic) he marshalled my oldest son and away they went to a rented truck sitting in my driveway. I was left holding a dust-covered photograph in a discount-house frame. It was Matthew, my oldest, now fifteen and all sinewy, nearly a man with broad shoulders and a dismissive grunt where once a "Hi Mom!" used to reside. This particular photo, however, showcased an entirely different Matthew. A two-year-old Matthew, bi-level skater haircut (what was I thinking), blue tank top showcasing noodle-thin arms, cowlicks all of the way around his head making his straight hair stand out in odd places around the skater's "cap" of locks. A younger version of my dad was standing beside Matt, grinning like a chesire cat. My son, not smiling and not grimacing, sat astride, of all things, an ostrich, on Chattanooga's Coolidge Park carousel. The double meaning was certainly not lost on me as I stood in my kitchen wiping dust from the center of the picture. At that point in my life, Matt was my only child and his journey was only beginning. I could still exert my considerable powers as a mommy to protect and defend him from nearly everything negative. And buddy, you better believe that I did! As I gazed at the carousel ostrich I thought of how I had been, unbeknownst to me, about to take the ride of my own life as Matt soared on into the real world, followed close behind by his brother Jonathan, a ride much wilder and more unpredictable than any astride an untamed ostrich would ever be. Motherhood is the, well, mother of all rides. It is an emotional rollercoaster of bizarre dimensions, contorting the spirit and soul in unimaginable ways, bending us until we are certain we should have broken again and again. I'll never forget my own mother's (she has four children) words as she sat beside my hospital bed after I had Matt. "Well," she intoned with a sigh, "you've drawn your last carefree breath." Truer. Words. Were. Never. Spoken. 

Pulling Weeds

Escapist behaviors are like weeds. They grow up underfoot without our really understanding how they got there in the first place and, heaven forbid, how they ever got so big without anyone seeing it happen! I may be a unique brand of person, but I have always enjoyed a spate of ever-revolving interests into which I can disappear for hours. The advent of the internet was my absolute undoing. I can research obscure topics for hours now. I passed through the scrapbooking phase (tons of great shopping on the internet), the rabbit phase, the canary phase, the lovebird phase. The real estate shopping phase lasted for several years, and resulted in one house purchase, an in-town move. A real estate agent even called me one day based on some "What is Your Home Worth" questionnaire I filled out. "The makers of RealTracs, when crafting that fine database, never expected it to be used as entertainment," I told the agent, while apologizing for wasting her time. She laughed. I entered a rug-making phase when I had my miscarriage a year-and-a-half ago. Not much research available there, so I have set about shopping for kits on ebay and stockpiling my favorites. I don't overspend, don't smoke, don't drink, don't do drugs and have no immoral habits, unless you count mindless junk-food eating, which really is outside my personal moral code. So onward I go into my escapes, any time I feel the sting of rejection, the whip of failure, or the whisper of disappointment. This morning I announced with conviction: "We will not be going to McDonald's today." On my way back home from Centennial High School, where I dropped Matt off grumpy and TARDY, I swung through the drive-thru and got, not only my usual, but one additional item. It was like I was mocking myself!

What to do? Well, I came up with an interesting idea for today. I decided to make a list of my escapist behaviors (yes, my beloved McDonald's breakfast burrito is at the top) in a single column. On the opposite side of the page I thought I might list all of the issues that I am running from. Maybe across the bottom a list of scriptures describing the help from Almighty God that I could enjoy in dealing with said issues. I love it that, on the way to the high school this morning, I heard Mandisa singing "He is With You." She describes some mighty earth-shattering events in that song, things folks are going through every single day. God is always with me. Even when my weaknesses overtake me and I inhale a strawberry-creme pie in the blink of an eye.

Longing for Home

Just now as I was sitting here on my back deck, a little bird, mostly brown with a pinkish-red head, landed in between the posts of the railing. He or she didn't mean to join me, and after the little thing cocked its head and gave me a glance, it rocketed away. The natural world is my favorite link to Jesus. I see Him in everything. This morning, as I was driving up my driveway, returning from taking my son to the middle school, two doves were poking around in my new landscaping out front. Looked like one of them had found some suitable twigs for crafting a nest. God at work, all around me. Every single day, whether or not I care to dwell on it. Whether or not I am too busy with the many things that are passing away like two fistfuls of sand to enjoy them, to learn more and more about who He is from them. To hear the messages of joy and love they are sounding all around me.  "For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead..." (Romans 1:20, NKJV). One day, and possibly very soon, Jesus Christ will return for those of us who love Him. He will openly rapture us, carrying us to our eternal home. The world as we know it will be revealed as having been a dim foretaste of the glories, the colors, the sights and the sounds of paradise. What if I, as Michael Card so eloquently stated in one of his iconic Christian songs, seek to know Him "in the now"? Will not that moment be all the richer, all the sweeter, all the more glorious? What if I praise and adore Him now, communing with His precious Holy Spirit in all of the many ways He has provided, each and every single day? Will the day of His return not be more like a wonderful, loving home-going of a child a parent so desperately wants to hold within His arms than if I merely rest in my salvation while going about an earthly-minded life? Lord, let me long for home, and fan that longing into a flame that burns brightly for Jesus!!

Unique in All Creation

I know I have harped on this enough for the blog to begin to look like a diatribe...but there is simply something about springtime that throws a big gust of wind under my sails. I am listening to the birds outside my window even now, enjoying the rays of sunlight making the hardwoods in my foyer glow. Jesus is straight-up in all of this. He is in this day. His holiness, His perfection, His fascinating personality is in every little detail of creation. The most important creation He ever fashioned was US. You and me, and every single other human who ever pulled a shoe on to walk His beautiful earth. I have always loved the ways in which people's personalities and perspectives differ. I love asking them about their hobbies, their families, their lives. My interest in the human race makes going on vacation even richer, more rewarding. We usually go someplace other people like to go (enjoying yourself is the point). This means that I get to indulge in a favorite pasttime: people-watching. This is particularly fun in a place like the giant lodge at Old Faithful, where I found myself a few summers ago. There is something about seeing people relax and have fun. I loved hearing the excited buzz of visitors of all ages and nationalities discussing things they'd seen and were about to see. It sounded like a happy hum, with lots of laughter splashed in. I enjoyed the sight of families posing in group shots, everyone joking and playing around. I guess it reminded me of the fact that, though we are all so beautifully diverse, God created us all in His image, so that we are capable of appreciating his artistry, so starkly displayed by the legendary geyser and the surrounding Yellowstone, one of the most wildlife-diverse places on the earth. Gary and I love national parks, so my joy in a setting like the Old Faithful lodge is always compounded by the fact that we are in a wonderfully wholesome environment. I enjoy resting in those places of human outpost (and comfy chairs with snacks nearby) in the midst of the grandeur of God's creation,where there is a palpable excitement about the wonders of God's world. Back to the people-watching. When you hear the excited hum of a crowd in a place where people gather to have fun, enjoy the arts, nature or anything of worth (and yes, rollercoasters have worth), it underscores the fact that people are so beautifully complex, both emotionally and in our intellectual capacity to appreciate what God has done and is doing both in the natural world and in the world of man's invention (which is nothing more than a shadow, or reflection, of God's creativity). No, we are nowhere in the ballpark of His limitless brilliance as an inventor who plans to the infinite detail, orchestrating everything with perfection, His artistic ability, and His creative capacity, but we are made in His image, so we can have fun imagining what He was thinking or just looking at what He has done in the natural world or through the talents He has given to humans. We are unique in all creation in these capacities. The Bible makes it clear that He is always seeking to fellowship with us. That blesses me beyond belief. Here's a scripture passage to ponder: "The Lord looks from heaven; He sees all the sons of men. From the place of His dwelling He looks/On all the inhabitants of the earth; He fashions their hearts individually; He considers all their works." ( Psalm 23:13-15, NKJV). He is as interested in us as we are in Him! How precious this knowledge is!