In Memory of Carson James Davis

I never met Carson. Well, perhaps in my dreams...those not remembered. I met his cousin in my remembered dreams...the child I miscarried at 42. My dreams are vivid and remind me that the veil between this life and the next is very thin, sheer at times.

My husband's nephew and his wife lost Carson recently. A handful of days from his due date, his ethereal soul passed into eternity, leaving behind a beautiful shell that was delivered by doctors and placed into the arms of his grieving parents and grandparents. He was photographed and caressed, but his spirit was already with God.

What this little boy will never know is sin and heartache, loss, struggle, and disappointment. What he will know none of us earthbound beings can say, though we are absolutely certain that it is wonderful beyond imagining. He was fully innocent and is now physically with his heavenly Father.

I heard someone say once that babies grow up in heaven. That remark rang true to me. God is their Father and they know no lack as they grow. When we encounter them on the other side, they won't be a static, unknowing infant. They will be fully alive and continuously developing as a unique person.

The experience of carrying Carson and eagerly anticipating his entrance into the world, into her world, is not wasted for his mother. No, Carson has an eternal soul that is now with God. He is more alive today than he was in the womb. His mother and father were the God-ordained conduits for his existence and they will meet him one day. It will be a joy-filled reunion sparkling with beauty and other-worldly love. God will envelop them as they embrace. He brought them together on earth and He will reunite them in the hereafter.

When we lose a loved one on this finite, fallen earth, we feel shattered beyond repair because we cannot see, feel, or hear them. We cannot talk to them, sing with them, enjoy with them. We cannot hug them or cry with them. It's difficult beyond expression. Words fail and tears fall. But God. He is our Rock and Redeemer and the assurance of our becoming reunited with those He has put into our lives. He is absolutely faithful and He will do it. And in the in-between time He will count our tears as they fall.

Psalm 56:8 (New Living Translation)
 "You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book."