What Really Matters

Lately I have been reading the Caring Bridge posts of Cheryll Scruggs, mother of the beautiful model/blogger/online fashion magazine editor Lauren Scruggs who was hit by a private plane's propeller on December 3rd and gravely injured. Lauren lost her left hand and her left eye. The Scruggs family has been plunged into a time of deep intercession, keeping a prayerful vigil at Lauren's bedside as she struggles to recover. The result has been a moving story of faith against the odds and daily miracles as Lauren, who probably should not have survived, continues to amaze doctors with her progress. Cheryll recently made a plea to Caring Bridge readers that they not spend time focusing on what is not important. "It's not worth it," she writes. How true this is. There are certain sins that I am well familiar with in my own life. I know that I fail to control my temper. I know that I am not always careful with my language, a shocking admission for a Christian woman, but there it is (incidentally, this admission is accompanied by shame and an acknowledgement that I can do better if I will let God help me). I know that I frequently fail to do the very things I know the Lord wants me to do, when He wants me to do them. Lately, however, I have felt God calling me to analyze my life even further. I believe in healthy boundaries in relationships. Sometimes, though, I have carried that standard into the realm of selfishness, pettiness, and childishness. Love means not always having to be right. Love means giving up the notion that I will always be treated fairly. Love means always turning away from the idea of making other people feel the way they have made me feel. The Bible tells us to "do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Nowhere in scripture does God endorse the idea of doing unto others as they have done unto you, or, as is often the case with people like me who reject before they can be rejected, doing unto others before they have a chance to do unto you. How does all of this rumination tie into Cheryll Scruggs' posts? Well, the notion of focusing on what really matters strips away a lot of the petty pride issues that lead to unrest, anger, and broken relationships. I would never want my last conversation with a loved one to center on some meaningless comment they made to me or how they have overlooked me in some small matter. How would I feel if my last conversation on earth with one of my children was an angry tirade about a math grade or a messy room? These are points to ponder. It's interesting that we cannot grow as Christians without feeling the Holy Spirit tap us on the shoulder and remind us that it's how we react in DIFFICULT situations with difficult people that determines how much we love God. The Bible makes it clear that if we do not love, we do not know Him.